Friday, March 23, 2018
March 23 2018. And I am resurrecting my blog again from my early treatment days of breast cancer. I have entered the battle once again, now for the third time. I wish to keep in contact with my friends through another medium than Facebook. I am unsure whether I will continue with Facebook much but do not wish to exclude my friends from my life. They are the most important part of my life. I will try not to be boring.
Wednesday, September 7, 2011
Friday, October 16, 2009
Thursday, April 30, 2009
Wedding Update
We have a wedding Bulletin. Due to concerns over risks of a World-wide pandemic ,that may have originated in Mexico, the wedding of Reagan and Bing is being relocated to the Island of Kauai. (I couldn't make this stuff up. What next?) My radiation oncologist, Dr Mattson, who is from Hawaii, has recommended an excellent Wedding planner who could handle such a last-minute event.
We are planning to leave for Kauai on May 5, and I for one, plan to have a really good time. We are pleased to be celebrating this union on the original schedule, if not in the original place. For those not able to fly to the Hawaiian Islands on short notice, remember there will be another party coming soon to an island much, much nearer to you. For me, the ability to do so, makes me feel very lucky indeed, today. I am sorry for all those unable to be there, but I will take lots of pictures to share with all of you.
We are planning to leave for Kauai on May 5, and I for one, plan to have a really good time. We are pleased to be celebrating this union on the original schedule, if not in the original place. For those not able to fly to the Hawaiian Islands on short notice, remember there will be another party coming soon to an island much, much nearer to you. For me, the ability to do so, makes me feel very lucky indeed, today. I am sorry for all those unable to be there, but I will take lots of pictures to share with all of you.
Change, all changes, Cambio, Todo Cambio
I apologize for the fact that it has been a long time since I have updated the posting. Mostly I have been just scrambling to keep up, with treatments, changes in plans, decisions, just life. My energy has been less but I really don't feel too bad. The radiation has been okay, and my skin is great. I do feel pretty stressed though.
I have been doing a lot of research on my particular type of breast cancer in the last three weeks, and have become increasingly unsure of the treatment course decided upon. I am comfortable with the decision to do lumpectomy and whole breast irradiation as being sufficient to treat the local disease, but the information that there are questions about whether even tiny Triple negative breast cancers need systemic chemotherapy treatment, which is being questioned with very preliminary research, has been really bothering me. The standard of care suggests below 1 cm with no node spread "May" not need chemotherapy, if over that in size, yes. If below .5 not needed. My tumor was .8, a gray zone, and accorded to Doctor discretion, based on statistics, ....chemo not necessary. The numbers quoted did not seem to suggest that Chemotherapy changed things very much. My chance of no recurrance is very, very good. It seemed a reasonable thing to follow the standard of care, and no chemo.
However, the cancer I have is aggressive, may spread by other means than lymph system, and tends to metastise early if it is going to. If this one hasn't shown up again in 18 months to two years, it likely won't and the numbers get better later, unlike my previous ER+ tumor where the risk of recurrance stays the same over ten years. The thing is, if it does metastasize, it is sneaky about it and goes places that only symptoms will find it like brain, bone, liver, etc. Other breast cancers are like this also and at that point they can only slow it down not cure it.
I have discovered that if treated early enough, this cancer is acutely sensitive to chemotherapy. Since I have some concern that it could already be somewhere else, I feel that now is my chance to stop it everywhere it could be, and that is why I have chosen to have the chemotherapy after all. The other element of this, is that there is some doubt in the research community about the best way to treat these very aggressive, very tiny cancers, as there is not much data on this and if perhaps it should be treated more aggressively, even though small. The reason there is not much data on the early cancers, is that they are usually found in a later stage. So , In my mind, the numbers may not really reflect the true risks. The numbers they are quoting me on recurrance risk might be re-evaluated some day. Lets say I just trust my "gut instinct" more than their statistics. My "gut" is telling me to be more aggressive. Being an engineer, Ron loves those numbers, and I do wish everyone diagnosed with cancer could have the "good numbers" that I have and I know I am not being very scientific in not trusting them more. The thing is I don't want to regret not fighting harder, when I had a chance to perhaps beat this thing for good. After chemo, I hope to be able to rest easy, that I have done everything, and if it comes back anyway, which it can, that I tried and I can fight it again if necessary. I will begin chemotherapy on May 19, and will be doing 4 cycles three weeks apart. I have spoken with several other survivors and I am confident that this is the right course of action for me. We will not know if having the chemotherapy has changed the course at all, only if it doesn't, but I can't change that. I am reminded of my favorite, "Serenity Prayer"
God, grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change,
The courage, to change the things I can,
And the Wisdom to know the difference.
I am praying for this to be a "wise" decision.
Dee
I have been doing a lot of research on my particular type of breast cancer in the last three weeks, and have become increasingly unsure of the treatment course decided upon. I am comfortable with the decision to do lumpectomy and whole breast irradiation as being sufficient to treat the local disease, but the information that there are questions about whether even tiny Triple negative breast cancers need systemic chemotherapy treatment, which is being questioned with very preliminary research, has been really bothering me. The standard of care suggests below 1 cm with no node spread "May" not need chemotherapy, if over that in size, yes. If below .5 not needed. My tumor was .8, a gray zone, and accorded to Doctor discretion, based on statistics, ....chemo not necessary. The numbers quoted did not seem to suggest that Chemotherapy changed things very much. My chance of no recurrance is very, very good. It seemed a reasonable thing to follow the standard of care, and no chemo.
However, the cancer I have is aggressive, may spread by other means than lymph system, and tends to metastise early if it is going to. If this one hasn't shown up again in 18 months to two years, it likely won't and the numbers get better later, unlike my previous ER+ tumor where the risk of recurrance stays the same over ten years. The thing is, if it does metastasize, it is sneaky about it and goes places that only symptoms will find it like brain, bone, liver, etc. Other breast cancers are like this also and at that point they can only slow it down not cure it.
I have discovered that if treated early enough, this cancer is acutely sensitive to chemotherapy. Since I have some concern that it could already be somewhere else, I feel that now is my chance to stop it everywhere it could be, and that is why I have chosen to have the chemotherapy after all. The other element of this, is that there is some doubt in the research community about the best way to treat these very aggressive, very tiny cancers, as there is not much data on this and if perhaps it should be treated more aggressively, even though small. The reason there is not much data on the early cancers, is that they are usually found in a later stage. So , In my mind, the numbers may not really reflect the true risks. The numbers they are quoting me on recurrance risk might be re-evaluated some day. Lets say I just trust my "gut instinct" more than their statistics. My "gut" is telling me to be more aggressive. Being an engineer, Ron loves those numbers, and I do wish everyone diagnosed with cancer could have the "good numbers" that I have and I know I am not being very scientific in not trusting them more. The thing is I don't want to regret not fighting harder, when I had a chance to perhaps beat this thing for good. After chemo, I hope to be able to rest easy, that I have done everything, and if it comes back anyway, which it can, that I tried and I can fight it again if necessary. I will begin chemotherapy on May 19, and will be doing 4 cycles three weeks apart. I have spoken with several other survivors and I am confident that this is the right course of action for me. We will not know if having the chemotherapy has changed the course at all, only if it doesn't, but I can't change that. I am reminded of my favorite, "Serenity Prayer"
God, grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change,
The courage, to change the things I can,
And the Wisdom to know the difference.
I am praying for this to be a "wise" decision.
Dee
Sunday, April 19, 2009
Spring
The weather here in Lewiston is really starting to look better to us. We have had lots of sunshine and morning frosts are gettting quite rare. It is getting up in to the 60's some days. The daffodils and hyacynths are blooming and the trees are budded, and hopefully will soon have some leaves. It will just be getting beautiful here, when it will be time for us to leave for Mexico. Sure did get the plan turned inside out this year, for where to be when!
My treatment is coming to an end, just 8 more sessions to go, and still no radiation burns, just a slight color change. I do get pretty sore after a treatment, but the discomfort subsides by the next morning. Today I get the day off. I had a Saturday treatment this week, which allows us to finish the day before we leave for Mexico, instead of having to go from the last treatment to the airport. A major improvement in the plan. I am still using aloe vera on my skin, and it is doing a great moisturizing job. I am finding myself quite fatigued and emotional these days. Better not wear mascara at the wedding.
This week we had some challenges develop. Cameron was down-sized at his work on Wednesday, and big blow to the guy that prefers to make the leaving decisions himself. He has hit the ground running though, with lots of options in the work, and his resume, always at the ready. We are anxious about the timing with his house purchase in the next few weeks, but we think things will work out for that.
We have celebrated this week, with the 2nd birthday of MaKenna on April 15, and Brittany's birthday on Saturday. Everyone enjoyed gettting together at Tyler and Amy's house. Ron is consulting and getting the motorhome ready to be sold on e-bay.
The ice went off lake muskoka on Friday. The Taylors are freed from their island.
My treatment is coming to an end, just 8 more sessions to go, and still no radiation burns, just a slight color change. I do get pretty sore after a treatment, but the discomfort subsides by the next morning. Today I get the day off. I had a Saturday treatment this week, which allows us to finish the day before we leave for Mexico, instead of having to go from the last treatment to the airport. A major improvement in the plan. I am still using aloe vera on my skin, and it is doing a great moisturizing job. I am finding myself quite fatigued and emotional these days. Better not wear mascara at the wedding.
This week we had some challenges develop. Cameron was down-sized at his work on Wednesday, and big blow to the guy that prefers to make the leaving decisions himself. He has hit the ground running though, with lots of options in the work, and his resume, always at the ready. We are anxious about the timing with his house purchase in the next few weeks, but we think things will work out for that.
We have celebrated this week, with the 2nd birthday of MaKenna on April 15, and Brittany's birthday on Saturday. Everyone enjoyed gettting together at Tyler and Amy's house. Ron is consulting and getting the motorhome ready to be sold on e-bay.
The ice went off lake muskoka on Friday. The Taylors are freed from their island.
Thursday, April 9, 2009
Radiation Mid-point
Here I am at the mid-point of radiation treatment. I can hardly believe that I have not posted in so much time. I do spend some time on-line everyday replying to e-mails, shopping and doing internet research on various topics. Between that and eating and going to Roswell every day and frequent siestas, the days go by. I guess they go by fast, but my life feels like it is lived in slow motion.
The treatments are going well, my skin is staying in good condition. There is a burning sensation and some swelling of the treated area, and a little discomfort but it isn't too bad. I continue to use the aloe vera gel on my skin twice a day. The surgical sites are well- healed and looking better every day.
Cameron and Jessica were successful in their bid on the foreclosed house. We are very happy about their purchase of the house on 120 Lincoln Ave. in North Tonawanda. They have not yet had an offer on their old house, but with the nicer spring weather I am sure something will happen soon. They will get the house on May 6, just before they leave to go to Reagan's wedding. They can have a little vacation before the work begins. The house needs some TLC, but I think they will be very happy with it.
Not much else happening here. Ron is working on projects and we have done some shopping for Reagan's wedding and for our return to Mexico in a few weeks. We are planning a family dinner for Easter on Saturday.
Another snowstorm happened this week, which has kept us off the bikes, but the snow is gone now, and it is time to get back to exercising. The green grass is much nicer to see than the snow was.
The treatments are going well, my skin is staying in good condition. There is a burning sensation and some swelling of the treated area, and a little discomfort but it isn't too bad. I continue to use the aloe vera gel on my skin twice a day. The surgical sites are well- healed and looking better every day.
Cameron and Jessica were successful in their bid on the foreclosed house. We are very happy about their purchase of the house on 120 Lincoln Ave. in North Tonawanda. They have not yet had an offer on their old house, but with the nicer spring weather I am sure something will happen soon. They will get the house on May 6, just before they leave to go to Reagan's wedding. They can have a little vacation before the work begins. The house needs some TLC, but I think they will be very happy with it.
Not much else happening here. Ron is working on projects and we have done some shopping for Reagan's wedding and for our return to Mexico in a few weeks. We are planning a family dinner for Easter on Saturday.
Another snowstorm happened this week, which has kept us off the bikes, but the snow is gone now, and it is time to get back to exercising. The green grass is much nicer to see than the snow was.
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